If you (it's about men) dreamed about a greenhouse, then you attach great importance to foreplay in sex. And for that you value your partners. The trouble is in one, sometimes you deliberately tighten it, in order to prolong the pleasure, and this intention women can no longer appreciate. Try to engage in spontaneous sex or shorten the time of foreplay. It's possible that your mistake is that you do not stimulate the partner's erogenous zones at all and therefore you can not get the true pleasure from foreplay. Ask her about this.